Friday Five: Sex Education Season 4
The beloved Sex Education gang spends season 4 at a liberal, student-run college that is open-minded, artsy and very queer-friendly. We follow their hilarious, heartbreaking and transformative journey through identity discovery, relationships and of course, sex.
Keep reading for 5 moments we loved and the lessons from this season that slayed.
*Last two are spoiler alerts*
Nudes Are Not for Everyone
Otis faces some real-life struggles with sex while in a long-distance relationship with his girlfriend, Maeve. She sends him a spicy nude and he stresses about how to respond, frantically taking photos of himself and hating every single one. Otis finally calls Maeve and confesses to her that he’s not really into nudes, and instead, they start having steamy phone sex.
Keeping the heat in long-distance relationships can be difficult, but never feel pressured to do anything that you’re not really into. Mutual masturbation, sexy audio notes and dirty talk are ways you can get intimate with your partner from afar. Try them out and find what’s arousing to you!
2. “Queer” Is Not an Outfit
The cool gang at the new college are all kind, queer, quirky and colorful. Love it! However, while it is common and celebrated for queer folx to dress and act flamboyantly, it is not a defining trait. One story follows a transitioning transgender person named Cal, who dresses simply and is shy at parties. Still, their peers welcome them on the dance floor and advise them on their transition journey.
Your self-expression is radically unique and you don’t have to force yourself to dress, act or be any certain way to feel empowered within your identity.
3. Consent for Climax
Jackson seeks counsel from Otis after a hot, but unexpected climax with a casual fling. He shares that she put her finger in his butt, and he was shocked but aroused and now feels confused about it. Otis explains that it is perfectly normal for men to enjoy prostate stimulation, but his partner should always ask for consent before doing so.
Even if you know that someone might enjoy it, you must always ask before putting your fingers anywhere, periodt. You can follow Jackson’s approach, by telling your partner to ask questions. Starting with the simple things like “Can I take off your shirt? Can I kiss you here?” Not only does this build tension, but it creates a safe space for consensual exploration.
4. Normalize Asexuality
The college’s original therapist, Sarah “O” Owens, is competing against newcomer Otis for the title of school sex counselor. During a debate, in an effort to expose her, Otis shares that Sarah is known to ghost people she is dating. Sarah makes the huge confession that she is asexual, and felt nervous once things were leading toward intimacy so she just completely cut off her partners.
Asexuality is a sexual orientation in which someone experiences little to no sexual attraction toward others. There are many misconceptions about this orientation, but we hope that representation in mainstream culture like this one will empower asexual folks to feel more confident in coming out.
5. Be Free, Be the Change
Throughout the show, Eric faces a dilemma with his gay identity and Christian community. In this season he is especially conflicted as his family pushes him to be baptized, and he begins to get signs from God that he belongs in a Christian community. In the final episode, he can no longer hide his truth; he comes out to his church and shares that he wants to be a pastor.
This is a very nuanced difficulty that many queer folks face when it comes to exercising their faith. Eric shows us that one can choose to be the change toward inclusivity for their community. Your relationship with God and faith is personal to you, and no one can take that away from you.
