Friday Five: Spooky Love
What more iconic spooky couple than Morticia and Gomez from The Addams Family?
In every portrayal of their relationship, they are head over heels for one another; why does their relationship work so well and what can we learn from it?
Keep reading for 5 ways this movie couple can inspire your costume and relationship this Halloween.
Tend Towards Each Other
Morticia and Gomez know each other very well; they care about the passions and interests in each other's life and they are always supportive of one another.
Take for instance the family's reaction when Gomez is playing with his trains. Morticia knows this is a sign that something is troubling him, and she tries to find ways to help him sort the situation out.
Whether it's looking at your partner playing golf or encouraging them to "seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade," taking time to truly know your partner, their inner world, and what matters to them will help you stay connected.
2. Continous Co-Creation
The Addams family lives in stark contrast to the world around them, and they own their unique and strange lifestyle.
Many of the patterns we display in our relationships are learned behaviors. Taking the time to make sure your relationship is being customized for the people involved can help make sure your shared space is a space that fosters respect and growth for one another while meeting you exactly where you are.
Your relationship is YOURS to feel comfortable with.
(And everyone else involved).
3. Loving Language
Morticia and Gomez are very expressive of their love and are constantly offering words of affirmation. Gomez sends courting love letters to Morticia even after they are married as if he knows he must continue to nourish their union.
Even if words of affirmation are not your or your partner’s love language, finding ways to share gratitude for their presence will make them feel appreciated and show you are continuously desiring their love and admiring them, regardless of how long you've been together.
5 Love Languages Reminder:
Words of affirmation
Acts of service
Quality time
Receiving gifts
Physical touch
4. Salacious Speaking
This spicy couple speaks openly about sex, which creates a deeper level of intimacy and allows for opportunities to explore the full spectrum of their sexuality together.
“Talking about sex is more intimate than having sex.”
— Dr. John Gottman, Relationship Expert and Psychologist.
While this couple might be especially kinky, this principle of openly manifesting sexual desires to each other applies regardless of the type of sex you are into.
Finding ways to communicate your desires in a way that feels comfortable yet passionate can foster sexual fulfillment within the relationship. Need guidance? Learn about the 5 Sex Languages.
5. Fearless Expression
Whether dancing slow tango or giving each other tantalizing stares, Morticia nor Gomez hold back when expressing how much they care for one another. Their intense love knows no bounds or shame.
We might have past experiences of unrequited feelings, being hurt or taken advantage of, so we might be reluctant to fully express our love; sometimes out of fear. Working on healing what past relationships (romantic or not) might have left you with is a valuable effort as it will make it easier for you to go with the flow of healthy love.
