Friday Five: Your O is Your Valentine
We know your V-day sex will be hot—whether it be solo, partnered, in a group, or non-penetrative! Check out our latest blog post for 5 non-penetrative sex ideas. Oral sex is a fan favorite—especially for those with a clit! According to a study published in The Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, 53% of vagina-owners were able to climax through oral sex, compared to only 15% through penetration.
Keep reading for 5 tips on how to strengthen your O-game for better orgasms all around.
It’s all in the Motion
According to the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, there are 4 motions those with a clit enjoy the most—up and down, circular, side to side, and rapid pushing (pulsating) in one spot. Play with different motions, pressure and speeds to see what your partner reacts to best. Listen to their bodies!
“If they’re pushing against your tongue, they probably want a harder pressure. If your partner is pulling their hips back they probably want a lighter caress.”
2. Ball of Action
If you’re giving oral to someone with a penis, you can add to the experience by giving attention to their balls, which are often neglected yet have many nerve-endings to induce pleasure. The O School advises:
“Your partner might have balls that are taut and close to their body. In that case, start by licking and kissing around the scrotum, says sex educator Stella Harris.
If your partner has a scrotum that hangs lower from their body, it may be easier to try actual ball-sucking, Harris says. Start by gently stretching the skin. Then, take the balls into your mouth one at a time with a gentle sucking motion.
Once you and your partner are both comfortable, try humming a bit. This produces vibrations that can feel great on your partner’s balls.”
3. All at once
Another tip for penis pleasure-rs: deep throating! The trick for this skill is learning to control your gag reflex or desensitizing it. Sean Jameson from the Bad Girls Bible, recommends taking a sterilized dildo or toothbrush and slowly guiding it in your mouth toward the back of your throat, holding it there for up to 10 seconds without making any motion. Doing this 2-3 times daily for one week will make it easier with every time and your gag reflex won’t be as sensitive. You also have the option to practice with your partner! Sharing with them that you want to improve your skills is super attractive, and they will be happy to witness your enthusiasm and improvement over time.
4. Finger Play
Giving head to someone with a clit also involves practice, time and attention, but that doesn't mean it’s not just as enjoyable! Outside of clitoral stimulation, you can use your fingers to help induce vaginal orgasms.
Once your partner is wet and aroused from clitorial stimulation, try inserting (a clean!) index or middle finger into their vaginal opening. Love&Sex Answers shares these tips:
“Slide the tip of your finger in and out of her vaginal canal about ½ an inch–you can even move your fingertips in circles or twisting motion to trace the outer rim of her vagina. People love this because the first inch or so of the vagina is jam-packed with pleasure inducing nerves.”
5. Full Body ExplOsion
Whether you're going down on someone with a penis or pussy, make it a full-body experience. If your hands are free, caress their chest/breasts, smack their bum, use a finger to massage their anus. Make eye contact. And remember to communicate! Some people are shy or uncomfortable with receiving oral pleasure. Ask your partner(s) what they enjoy beforehand and reassure them that you’re enjoying it as much as they are. If you don’t exactly enjoy giving oral? Check out this article for advice on how to make giving head hot for you too!
Sexual Empowerment Is Priceless
The My Sex Bio Etsy store is live! Check out the 10-a-day reflection journal, sticker kits, and other digital resources for as little as 99¢.
Explore our sex-positive, empowering products throughout our website and take command of your sexuality.
