How Long Does it Take to Get Over a Breakup?
“How long will this pain last?” you may wonder. While we all would like to know, the sad news is that there is no definitive answer to this question. Many researchers have tried setting an amount of time vía different investigations but at the end of the day, grief hits us all in different ways and what may last 3 days for someone, can last 10 years for another.
About the investigations
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The results have shown that it can take an average time of 3.5 months to heal, and a divorce can take up to 1.5 years to recover if not more.
Scientific Research
A 2007 study looked forward to comparing the levels of distress people experienced after a breakup and compare it to their “normal” or everyday distress to see how different they act and feel during these situations. Out of 26 participants who experienced a breakup during the study, who also filled out a distress questionnaire every 2 weeks, they were drawn to the conclusion that after 10 weeks all participants were filled well again.
It’s important to understand that this research is quite small and should not be taken as the last word for how long does it take to get over a breakup. While after 10 weeks you can start feeling better, this is not the rule for everyone.
Another important thing to have in mind is that there are plenty of different variants that can make you grief a relationship more or less. Some of them can be commitment, fidelity, quality of the relationship, and who decided to end things.
How to Get Over Your Ex?
So… there’s no definitive answer to how long it takes to get over a breakup BUT there are things you can do to help yourself out of this sad situation!
Healing Tips
Give yourself space to feel
Feeling sad is ok, give yourself the space to feel your feelings. Just try to set a period of time, and don't drown in them forever. I know it sounds too logical but knowing when it’s time to move on and get active again is healthy. If this seems like a difficult task, ask a friend to bug you when this time comes.
2. Keep Busy
After giving yourself time to process feelings, try to find activities to keep your mind occupied.
New project at work? You are in!
New hobby? Let’s try it!!
Gym added another class? Signing up!
Have some time for an extra subject at college? Throw those books at me!
This way you’ll be able to keep your life going without the time to get over soaked in nostalgic thoughts. Also meeting new people and having new activities is a good way to get your brain working.
3. Ask for help
If you feel like the sad feeling is not ending, or it's difficult to get over some ideas… call a friend, a family member and ask for help. Even starting therapy sessions is an amazing way to cope with this. Always keep in mind that asking for help is OK!
4. Stick with “healthy” ways to deal with pain.
Maybe this is not the best time to try drugs or alcohol to ease your mind or to avoid them for some time. Or, if you can’t avoid them, try not to use them all the time as a way to stop your brain from thinking about your ex.
